It's Teasing Me (My Happy Self)

So I have this thing called a quick unpick (if you don't know what it is, it's used in sewing to unpick stitches that you don't want to be there). It's been in my pocket all day and I've been fiddling with it. It's sharp point teasing me wanting me to scratch myself. I've resisted the urge all day. Almost couldn't stop at one point, but I thought about what you said to me the second time I did it.

I thought about it long and hard, and so the feeling passed. If I hadn't have thought about what you said my wrist would not be clean right now. It would be red and slightly swollen where I would've scratched. I would be hiding my wrist from everyone's sight.

I would've only told like 3 people that I did it;
1: Jeremy
2: Naomi
3: Daniel (who I will always refer to as Dan)
These people are my closest friends they can help me through anything. Especially Jeremy and Naomi because they are older than me and they understand what I'm going through a lot more than Dan, because Dan doesn't like depression and stuff and he doesn't really know how to help people through it. So I always wait a few days before telling him, when I'm over it all.

This pain is always gonna be there. Nothing can get rid of it completely, but with my friends help I can survive it.

I am a strong person, even though sometimes I don't believe it.
I am beautiful, even though I don't think it.
I am happy, even though I don't show it.

I'm writing this to say that I want to change and I need my friends help. Only you guys can help me work through this. Make me tell you whats wrong. Make me smile. Make me laugh. Do everything you can to help me go back to my other self.

My Happy Self